Confused

I've never in my life had allergies before. I'm not sure if I'm developing them or if this is just a cold, but either way I'm sick. I had a cough attack at work, like I was choking only I could breathe. It was so random.. Anyways, after that fun was over, I got back to my job. I hopped back on register and took the order of a mom, her grown daughter, and her daughters' little boy. I guess they saw my coughing fit, because after I took their order, the mom told me that she hoped I feel better, and she was so genuine about it. The point I'm trying to make, is that that comment somehow made my day.
I don't know how I've gotten back down to the low point in life where it takes nothing but a smile to make my day, but here I am. I told myself I'd never let myself fall this far again and I meant it, but here I am. I don't even know why. But now that I'm here I'm finding reason after reason to be, and I don't know how to get back out. The only option I see is to wait. Just hurt until it stops hurting. I don't have anyone to come back and make it better, because they all left. Even the one who just came back around is leaving again.
I'm just confused as to why everyone leaves. I'm confused as to how the hell I ended up back at rock bottom when not the first thing had gone wrong.
Maybe this is the side effect of too much time alone, aka the side effect of graduating high school early.
I'm gonna let go and let God this time and maybe I'll make it out okay.